Well, I am here to help!
Google provides me with the list of phrases that people are searching for, and from this I will chose some of the most common questions and answer them here.
(Note: these are actual search terms. I am not making these up.)
Q: "how hilly is boston marathon"?
A: About a 3 on the hilly scale.
Q: "whats is a fast men's 5k time "?
A: To find what would be fast for you- Take your age, multiply by your weight, and then divide by the color of your shoes.
Q: "blister on my foot"?
A: Pop it, put a band aid on it, and quit being a baby
Q: "biting flies in umstead park raleigh nc"?
A: Oh, God yes.
To avoid biting flies:Q: "hilliest marathon"?
1) Mix 2 parts vinegar to 1 part tomato juice.
2) Apply to all exposed skin.
3) Don't leave the house.
A: If it isn't Pike's Peek, let me know.
Q: "are dog allowed in the uwharrie national forest"?
A: Yes. But put an orange collar on them during hunting season
Q: "running 5k with runners knee"?
A: Yes, go ahead
Q: "best shoe to cure runner's knee"?
A: Probably the ones you don't wear
Q: "softride bike for sale"?
A: Sorry, sold it.
Q: "runner knee quick fix"?
A: small steps
Q: "running knees 'days in a row'"?
A: I have no idea what you are asking, but I am going to say 5.
Q: "below 13:00 5k"?
A: In your dreams.
Q: "strollers" "city of oaks marathon" ?
A: Yes. Make sure you start in the front.
Q: "bad trots all day post half marathon"?
A: I'm so, so sorry to hear that.
Q: "amount ibuprofen chondromalacia runners"?
A: Exactly 2 metric handfuls per knee, or 4 pills per mile.
Q: "belch felt so good"
A: Glad to hear it!
Q: "my knee is cured"
Q: "anthony corriveau ruggedly handsome"?
A: Of course. (Wait. I think this was me ego-surfing.)
Well that's it for this weeks installment.
I plan on making this a regular feature, so check back soon.